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Leg Post 96
Leg Post 96 features a meeting between a representative of The Coordination and of the Slavemasters of Orion. The representative for Orion is named Noir, a colonel in the Orion military, and he is joined by a servant. The representative for The Coordination, who arrived aboard a "petal" starship, is a short, non-binary person named Padma. The dispute has arisen due to a ward having been raised on the Orion Headworld around an anthill, which claims the area as property of Alan of The Coordination. Padma explains that the Alan are actually a sapient species of ants that live in the anthill, much to the shock of Noir. The Alan all go by the same designation of "Alan" and claim that they had tried to communicate with the Orions already, but to no avail, so their cordoning of the area was a last resort. Padma is sure the Orions will be happy to negotiate cohabitation of the area, but Noir vows that the infestation of Alans would be wiped out. Padma initially threatens Noir with the possible retaliations of other galaxy powers; The Federation, The Alliance, The Galactic Empire, The High Empire. But Noir shrugs them all off and believes that Padma is weak, due to their short stature. But, upset by Noir's aggression, Padma is unable to control his shape for much longer and suddenly expands into a giant, towering over the buildings of the nearby city. An Alan reveals that Padma is actually a seventh-generation pixon, and only partially exists within the physical realm. The city defence corps contacts Noir to ask what is happening but Noir orders them to stand down out of fear for the colossal pixon. Padma manages to shrink themself back down and finds Noir far much agreeable. The Alan want to take advantage of this and propose a commercial deal. Post For Alan Among the incomprehensible totality of Forever, the NeSiverse is but a grain in an endless beach. Within the NeSiverse, the Milky Way Galaxy shines as only a speck, and while even viewing just the galaxy, worlds such as Orion remain relatively imperceptible. The world of Orion, however, seated one of the great galactic powers, its staggering spacescrapers swarming with starships trading in largely shady business deals. One innocuous shuttle, iridescent in color and in the general shape of a lotus flower, floats down towards the planet surface and towards one of the relatively warm and pleasant coastlines. Even here, though, Orions and other humanoids seem to crawl about along the beaches and coastal cities, their illicit activities hidden but still felt. The small spacecraft drifts gently, landing in a field not far from one of the beaches, surprisingly disturbing nothing below it. As one of its 'petals' slowly starts to lower to the ground, an imposing Orion male of a light green complexion stands at attention stands ready for whomever might walk out. He wears a sharp white suit that resembles something that an American southern gentleman or perhaps naval officer would wear, and he stood with the air of a practiced politician that has seen service, though of what sort is hard to tell, only that it was hard service. Despite his apparent background, he looks uneasy as he assesses his situation in waiting. He turns to another man standing behind him, also Orion but with darker green skin whose attire seems far less prestigious and holds a tablet in a servile manner. Before the imposing Orion says anything, the other, more servile one, starts speaking in anticipation. Orion Servant: "There have been no other vessels reported to have escorted this shuttle as per the agreement, Master Noir." The imposing man, Noir, still stands uneasy, unconsciously fiddles with his cufflinks. He takes no note as the servant attempts to further ease his master by straightening Noir's tie. Noir: "And yet we still know nothing about this so-called Coordination or what they want with us except hearsay from the Imperium and the High Empire." Orion Servant: "If I may ask, Master... what hearsay?" Noir: "That the Coordination is a threat to them, and nothing is a threat to those two in this galaxy, or this universe." The servant snaps open a metal tin lined with cigarettes, which Noir snatches one from without looking. As he puts it to his mouth, the servant lights it for him, the motions natural as if done thousands of times before. Noir takes a long drag, though as he notices someone finally stepping out, he quickly drops the half-used, still lit cigarette and steps on it with his boot. Before he can even identify what steps out, Noir slaps a smile on his face and starts speaking. Noir: "Welcome to the Orion Headworld. I am Colonel Noir, the acting delegate for the Orion interest in this--" Coordination figure: "Yes, Colonel, we're aware of your people's 'interest' and that is why I am here." As the figure steps down the "petal" ramp and stands next to Noir, it's quite clear how little they are next to him, not only in height and build but in the way they dress and carry themselves, wearing what he could only describe as "colorful pajamas" and perhaps just having woken up. They seem humanoid as well, to Noir's growing relief -- perhaps Indian even, if Noir knew of humans -- though non-binaryNon-binary Gender article, Wikipedia. in gender, and from what he could tell, 'artificial' in nature like an android or hologram. Unlike any artificial beings he knows of though, this figure seems more "real" than anyone or thing he's met, as if the fidelity of their very existence sits on a higher level. The figure holds their face briefly, as if to wake up, and breathes in before speaking again. Coordination figure: "Forgive my rudeness, please. It's just... it's been a long trip here. My name is Padma." Padma extends a hand towards Noir, and he in turns looks at it for a moment with uncertainty, conflicting feelings coursing through his mind at the person before him. Furthermore, he was used to taking a hand gently and perhaps with a kiss if it was a woman's hand and a firm grasp of forearms if it was a man, but as this person seems neither, Noir tentatively shakes their hand. Noir: "I presume you are the delegate for the Coordination interest in this matter, yes?" Padma: "The Coordination is made up of many Interests, and I have citizenship in at least three of them. I think. It's been a while since I've had to think about that." The Orion colonel blinks in confusion. Padma: "...right, your people think in property. But yes, enough other Interests in the Coordination agreed to send a representative -- me -- to reconcile the matter. I hope we can arrange something that works for everyone." To punctuate their words, Padma presents a weak, if genuine smile. Noir's own overcompensating smile drops. In response, Noir sweeps his hand away from the ship and gestures towards the opposite direction. Noir: "This way, please." Padma walks in the direction given, down towards a light dirt path, with Noir and his servant following behind, and the two of them notice that Padma seems to leave no footprints behind them. The path ends after hardly a minute's walk in the field, though, and at the end of the path is a small clearing with a small dirt mound in the center of it. The clearing itself is roped off at ankle-height, and though the rope would seem to hardly stop anything from crossing it over, several more militant-and-mercenary Orion types seem to act foolish as they attempt to cross or destroy the rope, only to seemingly struggle against themselves as they attempt to do so. When Noir approaches, though, the group stops their attempts and snap to attention. Noir nods to them before turning his attention to Padma. Noir: "These are my subordinates, Miss--uh--Mist--err--" Padma: "Just 'Padma', if you will." Noir: "--thank you, Padma. Yes, as I was saying, these are some of the best special forces we Orions have at our disposal." Padma: "Is that so." Their weak smile from earlier curls more warmly. Noir: "Despite what it may appear like, this area here seems to be under a ward of some sort, one that rose up after a recent attempt to clear the land for its new owners. Nothing seems to be able to pass through this barrier ei...ther..." He trails off as Padma simply walks over the rope, bending down to look at a tiny billboard not far from the anthill that reads "PROPERTY OF ALAN" and, underneath that, "MEMBERS OF THE COORDINATION" in a size just large enough to read. Padma shakes their head. Padma: "Tsk tsk, I expected better from fellow Coords." Noir: "So this is the work of someone in your government, then?" Padma: "A new member group, yes. Clearly, they have some explaining to do." Noir: "I'm glad you agree! Whoever this "Alan" is, they're violating Orion property law with this joke of theirs, blocking off this patch of dirt." Padma: "Anthill." Noir: "Excuse me?" Padma: "It's an anthill, and it's a part of their home." Noir: "...I'm not sure if I'm understanding you." Padma: "Oh geez, how do I explain this? You see, ants often live in what are called "anthills" though they actually live in fairly large and complex tunnels beneath and beyond the hill itself--" Noir: "I know what an anthill is!" His burst of anger quickly shifts to confusion, which only sinks deeper as a thought dawns on him. Noir: "Are you suggesting... that these ants belong to the Coordination?" Padma: "I'm suggesting no such thing!" Noir: "Oh thank gods." Padma: "I'm clearly saying that these ants are fellow citizens in the Coordination." Noir: "..." Padma: "They're known as Alan, and they and those at this site identify with several Interests which embody tenets of exploration, creation, philosophy, communication, and antitrust practices." Tiny Voice: "That was a bad joke!" Noir: "Who said that?" He whips around to his subordinates and his servant. Noir: "I didn't give any of you permission to speak!" Tiny Voice: "I said it!" All the subordinates and the servant shake their heads in defense of the angry glare from Noir. Tiny Voice: "Down here!" Slowly, Noir cranks his head sideways and down to the ground, where he sees an alien ant. Well, not alien to the world of Orion, but compared to the ants of earth, this one was a neon purple, and its antennae had antennae of its own. The eagle-eyed observer can even see that it's wearing what appears to be a yellow jumpsuit. Tiny Voice: "I hope you won't be cracking jokes too!" Padma: "I apologize, Alan. I can't help make puns, and I will refrain from making such insensitive jokes from now on." Alan: "Apology accepted. Are you the one the rest of the Coordination sent for us?" Padma: "Yes, I am. Now what's all this about declaring property. You've disturbed the local people with an inappropriate use of a Level-1 Naughtrapartition. Isn't that right, Colonel?" Noir: "........" Padma: "Look how upset they are! This is no way to treat your neighbors!" Alan: "We had no choice! Our words fell on deaf ears, and they were going to destroy our home hub! Do you know how difficult it is to find a clean site free from their infestation? Alan here can tell you the horror stories from the Underground Railroad she facilitates, and Alan over there can give you the pollution reports from the past hundred years." Noir's eyes widen as he sees more ants approach, slowly gathering in the hundreds and thousands even, some neon purple like the first while others are orange and metallic-grey. He stares in disbelief as he even spots what seem to be other tiny humanoids and other non-humanoids among the crowd of wildly different types. One of the first two to join speaks up. Alan: "The slaves we've helped escape make it clear that Orions only understand in terms of property, and so we have to speak their language!" The third chimes in. Alan: "And at this rate, they'll make this planet uninhabitable for even themselves in no later than fifty years!" Padma: "OK, OK, I think the man here has heard your concerns. I'm sure he'd be happy to negotiate with the people who want to co-locate with you here to ensure that both parties can benefit from each other. What do you say, Colonel Noir?" Noir: "...the ants... are talking..." Padma: "Yes, it's so much more productive when we can talk things out, wouldn't you agree?" Noir: "...this is absurd." Padma: "Pardon?" Noir: "Absurd! All of this! They...they need to be utterly wiped out!" Padma: "Oh dear -- hold on now, I don't think that would be in your best--" Noir: "They're an infestation on a scale unimaginable! And some shrimp in sleepwear is supposed to stop us? We'll scoop the whole site clear, and then flush out their tunnels..." Padma: "Your neighbors wouldn't take kindly to this news, I'd think." Noir: "These insects are NOT my neighbors, you twat!" Padma: "Oh, I was thinking more about this galaxy's Federation... Noir: "Those dirty drow and their friends? They wouldn't dare." Padma: "...and the Alliance that fought against the Galactic Empire..." Noir: "They still have their hands full, and have even had some of their operations Orion-funded!" Padma: "...and I hear the High Empire really doesn't like slavery..." Noir: "W-we don't have slaves! We have a strong work ethic built on paying the hours you owe service to your ma--your managers! And we have a very serviceable relationship with their government!" Padma: "Yes, and all those neighbors who have given you space out of respect for your 'neutrality' in their affairs may well change their minds when they hear how you conduct your business." Noir: "Oh this is rich. You think you can threaten the Orion Syndicate? You won't have much luck with that if you never leave." He snaps his fingers, and the special forces from before all point their weapons towards Padma. Noir: "It'll be unfortunate but small news to hear of a delegate's transport meeting an "accident" on the way over. Happens all the time. Of course, your people will want to know what happens, and we'll compensate them tremendously for their loss." Alan: "You'll never get away with this! We're sharing all this live with the rest of the Coordination as you speak!" Noir: "Like that matters. If this "Coordination" was so powerful, they'd have stopped us long ago if they wanted, yes? They either can't or don't care enough--" Padma: "Ugh, I didn't think I'd be staying this downscaled for so long. Urrf...." Noir: "What're you blathering about now?" Alan: "Padma's a seventh-generation pixon. They and their kind naturally live in high definition, and this universe to them is very low-def by comparison." Noir: "...what?" Alan: "That's not their normal size in this universe." On cue, Padma seems unable to control themselves any longer and loosens their belt. In an unceremonious flash, Padma grows at least three magnitudes larger, rivaling the size of some spacescrapers. To Padma, Noir and the others would be no larger now than ants themselves. They stare up, awe-struck at what they see before them. Padma: "Oh yeah, that feels much better. Could you repeat what you were saying before?" Noir: "Uh.... well..." Padma: "Hold on, it's hard for me to hear you like this." Clenching the belt tight, Padma instantly shrinks back down to their previous size. Padma: "There we go. Could you make it quick, though? I really don't like to be in this situation, if you know what I mean." Noir: "W-w-what I was saying was that we'll be mmmmore than happy to resolve this in a peaceful and agreeable manner for both of us..." What seems to be a walkie-talkie on one of the special forces starts speaking. Walkie-Talkie Voice: "Noir Unit, there was a momentary sighting of an unidentified...super-giant? They were spotted in your area, please report. We are sending reinforcements at this time and need to know--" Noir rushes over and snatches the walkie-talkie. Noir: "That's n-n-not n-necessary, Commander! This is Colonel Noir aaaaand everything's fine here. Peachy-keen. No need to send anything, thank you." Walkie-Talkie Voice: "But Colonel, what we saw was--" Noir: "--nothing! You saw nothing! DO NOT SEND ANYONE!" He looks behind himself towards Padma, hunched over the walkie-talkie, before pivoting himself both physically and psychologically. Holding the walkie-talkie behind his back, he offers his hand to Padma while bending at the waist. Noir: "We owe you a great debt in, uh, coordinating the needs of the Orion people and ...Alan." Speaking through his gritted teeth, his smile is admirably professional. Noir: "Thank. You." Padma: "I'm glad I could help! But this was really nothing, and the Coordination isn't one for debts anyway, so please, pay it forward. Take care then!" All Alans begin rejoicing in tiny, cute cheers. One turns their attention to Noir. Alan: "Do you think we could arrange for us opening up shop? We think we have a lot to offer in the Orion telecommunications market at competitive prices that would benefit the consumer." Noir begins to sob. References External References Category:Post Category:Leg Post